Okay...so I realize that I have had little luck in the dating world...Well apparently, the Universe was holding out on me and waiting for for this moment to release an intense love for me!
I believe in my heart that I have finally found the one for me!!! And the best part is that he feels the same!!! It's incredible. It's totally crazy but feels perfectly sane...it's completely illogical but makes perfect sense. I am so happy! I have been on cloud 9 since we met. We talk everyday, and it just gets better every day!!!
Finally, I have found someone who I can have a future with. I will have to write more as this progresses, but I wanted to put it out there...FINALLY it has happened to me!!! :)
Friday, April 1, 2011
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Feeling blue...
It's been a while since I've written on here, and I just needed to vent a little. I am so frustrated with trying to date. I can't seem to make it work for the life of me. An ex of mine, the only one I'd date again, entered my life, and came for a visit. There was obvious feelings there for both of us, and he expressed that he still loved me. I expressed the same. He currently lives a few hours away from me. I told him I'd be willing to drive every other weekend to see him to make it work. (He is moving back to my area in a year after his job contract expires.) Things seemed to be great for the first few days, and now I haven't heard from him in over a week.
This past weekend, I connected with a guy that I had been chatting with for a while on Facebook. We finally met up Saturday and had a bite to eat and good conversation. We got along well, and there was obvious chemistry. We kissed, and expressed our mutual desire to hang out again. He asked me to dinner the following night. I agreed, and we made plans. He sent me a text saying he'd be over in 20-30 minutes. That passed, an hour passed, another hour passed, and I sent a text asking if things were okay. No reply. I called. No answer. I sent an email. Nothing. Now I'm worried he got into an accident or something
I finally get a response via text last night at 11pm. It was long and drawn out, and honestly, didn't make sense. He has a daughter, and he made it sound like I was asking him to drop everything and put me number one in his life. I have no idea where this came from, nor would I ever ask someone for something like that...especially on the first day of knowing someone. It's insane. He said he'd call, but he hasn't. Maybe that's a good thing, who knows. I'd just like to have some closure with this so I can understand.
I feel like guys leave and I never know what happened or why things suddenly changed. Was it something I said? Something I did? Was it them? I have to clue, and no matter how I search for answers, no one replies. It's maddening really.
Anyway, thank you for letting me vent. I wish I had answers to my questions, but I guess I may just never know. Thanks for listening.
This past weekend, I connected with a guy that I had been chatting with for a while on Facebook. We finally met up Saturday and had a bite to eat and good conversation. We got along well, and there was obvious chemistry. We kissed, and expressed our mutual desire to hang out again. He asked me to dinner the following night. I agreed, and we made plans. He sent me a text saying he'd be over in 20-30 minutes. That passed, an hour passed, another hour passed, and I sent a text asking if things were okay. No reply. I called. No answer. I sent an email. Nothing. Now I'm worried he got into an accident or something
I finally get a response via text last night at 11pm. It was long and drawn out, and honestly, didn't make sense. He has a daughter, and he made it sound like I was asking him to drop everything and put me number one in his life. I have no idea where this came from, nor would I ever ask someone for something like that...especially on the first day of knowing someone. It's insane. He said he'd call, but he hasn't. Maybe that's a good thing, who knows. I'd just like to have some closure with this so I can understand.
I feel like guys leave and I never know what happened or why things suddenly changed. Was it something I said? Something I did? Was it them? I have to clue, and no matter how I search for answers, no one replies. It's maddening really.
Anyway, thank you for letting me vent. I wish I had answers to my questions, but I guess I may just never know. Thanks for listening.
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Hmmm
Although I am not a fan of personal drama, I guess it's inevitable at times. So the guy I have been hoping to date and I hung out two days in a row. We had a great time. As I was dropping him off, he reminded me he doesn't want a relationship right now, and he currently sees me as a friend. I was a little disappointed, to say the least.
During the week, I hardly heard from him, which is unusual for us. We usually text several times a day. He did take on a full time job, so I figured that was part of the issue. We were supposed to hang out Halloween weekend. We even spoke on the phone briefly. He told me he missed me, which was out of character for him to say randomly. Things seemed like they were back to normal. We didn't end up hanging out, and we planned on hanging out either Sunday or Monday.
On Sunday, he put up a questionable Facebook status...a big change in his life for the better with a heart after it. No idea what it means, nor did he offer an explanation. However, we texted briefly, wishing each other a good Monday, and then, nothing since then. I have no idea why. His best friend hasn't heard from him either. It's so odd. I hope he's ok, first and foremost. I wish I wasn't so attached to him, as I worry heartache will not be far away. But you can't help what the heart wants sometimes.
Right now, I just hope to hear from him so I know he's ok. The rest, I will deal with later. Anyway, I needed to vent. Not sure if anyone reads these, but thanks for listening.
During the week, I hardly heard from him, which is unusual for us. We usually text several times a day. He did take on a full time job, so I figured that was part of the issue. We were supposed to hang out Halloween weekend. We even spoke on the phone briefly. He told me he missed me, which was out of character for him to say randomly. Things seemed like they were back to normal. We didn't end up hanging out, and we planned on hanging out either Sunday or Monday.
On Sunday, he put up a questionable Facebook status...a big change in his life for the better with a heart after it. No idea what it means, nor did he offer an explanation. However, we texted briefly, wishing each other a good Monday, and then, nothing since then. I have no idea why. His best friend hasn't heard from him either. It's so odd. I hope he's ok, first and foremost. I wish I wasn't so attached to him, as I worry heartache will not be far away. But you can't help what the heart wants sometimes.
Right now, I just hope to hear from him so I know he's ok. The rest, I will deal with later. Anyway, I needed to vent. Not sure if anyone reads these, but thanks for listening.
Friday, October 22, 2010
It's been a while...
Right now, there is no major updates to my life. I did successfully lose 35 lbs, and I am feeling great! (So I guess that is a big update!) I should say, no major updates to my love life.
The guy I have had an intense interest in and I have been hanging out more. There is definitely physical and emotional chemistry, but he is holding on to being single so he can get further with his personal goals. He has been upfront about this from the start, but I have to admit it's frustrating me. He and I make so much sense. I know he knows it, but I also know he is holding strong to his ideas at this point. So I play the waiting game.
I just hope this works out sooner than later. Sigh.
The guy I have had an intense interest in and I have been hanging out more. There is definitely physical and emotional chemistry, but he is holding on to being single so he can get further with his personal goals. He has been upfront about this from the start, but I have to admit it's frustrating me. He and I make so much sense. I know he knows it, but I also know he is holding strong to his ideas at this point. So I play the waiting game.
I just hope this works out sooner than later. Sigh.
Monday, October 11, 2010
National Coming Out Day
It's hard to believe that in this day and age, gay people are still being so judged against. There are so many hypocrites and mean-spirited people in the world. I don't understand the need for harboring such hatred toward anyone, especially someone who is just trying to live his/her life.
I can speak from experience, being gay is not something anyone chooses...not any more than a heterosexual chooses to be straight. Believe me, no one wants to be mocked, live in fear, contemplate ending their life, being rejected by family & friends because of who they are attracted to. Yet, some people believe this is a choice gay people make on purpose.
Do we have the choice over how we live our lives? Absolutely! We are the masters of our own destinies. Sometimes, that is easier said than done.
My wish on this day of coming out is that we as humans, brothers & sisters, parents & children, friends, co-workers, as inhabitants of this planet could learn to accept each others' differences and celebrate them. We each have something wonderful to contribute to the world.
I hope you find peace in your heart today and everyday. Believe me...it's better to be happy and find joy in your heart than to dwell and let hatred fester in it's place.
"Acknowledging and accepting whatever stuff you may have to let go comes easier when you love yourself."
I can speak from experience, being gay is not something anyone chooses...not any more than a heterosexual chooses to be straight. Believe me, no one wants to be mocked, live in fear, contemplate ending their life, being rejected by family & friends because of who they are attracted to. Yet, some people believe this is a choice gay people make on purpose.
Do we have the choice over how we live our lives? Absolutely! We are the masters of our own destinies. Sometimes, that is easier said than done.
My wish on this day of coming out is that we as humans, brothers & sisters, parents & children, friends, co-workers, as inhabitants of this planet could learn to accept each others' differences and celebrate them. We each have something wonderful to contribute to the world.
I hope you find peace in your heart today and everyday. Believe me...it's better to be happy and find joy in your heart than to dwell and let hatred fester in it's place.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
History Repeats Itself
Well, it turns out the guy I have been interested in, who went back to his ex, left his ex. Shockingly, it turns out that the guy hadn't changed, and might have gotten worse. I can't say I'm surprised. Some people never change.
He and I went out recently, and he was rather flirty. Then he tells me that he doesn't think of me as "the one." I don't get it...and apparently I won't. He did say he can't say he won't wake up one day and feel that way about me. It's so confusing, to say the least.
At this point, I am just letting it ride. We can be friends, and I am not putting myself in the position of flirting anymore. If he has that kind of interest, I will let him pursue me. I am kind of done with the roller coaster ride right now.
In other news, I have lost 28 lbs. so far! I am looking good, and I can finally fit into all my clothing. In fact, I have to go through clothes and get rid of stuff that's too big!
So life is good.
He and I went out recently, and he was rather flirty. Then he tells me that he doesn't think of me as "the one." I don't get it...and apparently I won't. He did say he can't say he won't wake up one day and feel that way about me. It's so confusing, to say the least.
At this point, I am just letting it ride. We can be friends, and I am not putting myself in the position of flirting anymore. If he has that kind of interest, I will let him pursue me. I am kind of done with the roller coaster ride right now.
In other news, I have lost 28 lbs. so far! I am looking good, and I can finally fit into all my clothing. In fact, I have to go through clothes and get rid of stuff that's too big!
So life is good.
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