I am not exactly sure why it took so long to meet, but I know it wasn't on my part. But the moment we met face to face, I couldn't believe how I felt. It was like taking my expectations and having reality be 100x better!
Things really went well all day. We had great conversation, and there was definitely some physical chemistry going on. Apparently for him as well. We went to the beach, walked around, talked for hours, and had dinner that evening, and walked some more.
We had some very intense, deep, personal conversations, and it was amazing. We really connected.
Now on the outset of all this, I knew he wasn't looking for a dating situation because he may be enlisting in the armed forces soon, and he doesn't want to get involved, which makes sense. But I have to say, it was quite a confusing situation for both of us I think.
He did send me some sweet texts today. But, I think I overdid it. He got a little "smothered" by all the texts, which I understand. Why can't I ever just chill out and let things happen??? I am so mad at myself right now. I hope I didn't ruin my chances with him. I really think he could be the one...as crazy as it sounds.
Now I play the waiting game...a game I am not a good player at, and I hate losing, which is often how things end up. I am trying to distract myself with music, but not sure it's helping. I will remain optimistic and wait and see what kind of damage I have caused to this situation. Hopefully it's not too much. UGH!
It's so crazy...yesterday and most of today (up to about an hour ago), I have been on top of the world. I could not have been happier. Now, I feel so low and stupid, like I blew the chance of a lifetime. I truly hope that is not the case. I really do.
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